As I made my arrival to Alexander Muss campus, the bus ride was mostly quiet. Meeting the Madricha for the first time, just learning their first names. The small talk about the plane ride, how we were ready for dinner. Little did I know that the Machrachim and the students on this trip would become people who mean so much me all in such short time. We got settled into campus, ate dinner, and went right to bed. The first week of being on campus was definitely an adjustment. Getting used to the food, the time change, and all the different people to meet were pretty intimidating. Most of us were slightly homesick, but just wouldn’t admit it to the whole group. But the homesickness made my roommates and me so much closer. We bonded over our home lives, opened up about being homesick and how this experience is so much more amazing than being at home. Although the first week and a half was tough, I had a good feeling deep down about my trip. I was eager and excited to spend the next 7 weeks with this amazing group of people.

Now that we have gone on several Tiyulim, the bus rides are filled with nonstop laughter and noise. Hiking down Sataf, walking through Hezekiah’s tunnel while singing new and old songs, everyone was smiling and having a good time. This past week we visited the Western Wall in Jerusalem. Before we got to the wall, my teacher Yossi told us that it is okay if we cry, and it is a normal reaction. Being to Israel and the Western Wall once before, the wall did not have much meaning to me. There are always women and men crying at the wall, but I never thought that I would be the one crying at the wall. Recently losing loved ones in my family; I felt that I had a responsibility to talk to not only God but them also, to find some closure and peace for myself. And I can definitely say I found what I needed. After I lost my family members just days before I left for Israel, I did not want to come anymore. I wanted to be at home to mourn with my family, but there was one reason that pushed me to go. My aunt Chaya lives here in Israel and does not see the family from home very often. Aunt Chaya and my family wanted me to come to Israel to bring Aunt Chaya love from back home in Pennsylvania, and my dad told me that I was the only one who could truly do it. I thought of this moment at the Western Wall, that I am here for a reason. I put my prayers for my family and me in the wall, and the tears started to flow. I have never felt so close to God before, and it was truly something special for me. The feeling was indescribable. Even though I do not think my family could hear me talking to them, I still feel like I have found some closure with the loved ones I lost. I am so super excited to go back to Jerusalem and the Western Wall this upcoming Shabbat.

This trip has already made me realize a lot about myself. I learned to be myself, because I know the people on this trip will never judge me. This group has made me laugh more than I have laughed in a very long time. This group of people has made me happy and smile in a time of trouble, after losing loved ones just days before I left. I can not believe 2 weeks has already gone by, but I can’t wait to spend the next 6 traveling and learning all about Israel.